ready4change

Honestly I am quite surprised I ended up losing two pounds this week. I was very very good monday-friday of last week with my workouts (made it to the gym every day) and my eating/journaling. However, I pretty much took the weekend off. I didn’t really go overboard with my eating but I didn’t write anything down and I did eat some pizza and had a few beers. However, yesterday and today I got back on track. I was nervous to step on the scale today but thought, what the heck…and I was down two!! Yahoo!!! Had a great 30 minutes on the elliptical trainer today. I did the “weight loss” program and it kicked my butt. But I feel great now! (Glad the workout is over for the day tho.) Just wanted to share with everyone . Two pounds doesn’t feel like a lot however I know two pounds this week and next, and the next, and so forth will soon lead to 45!!!

Ugh…I truly hadn’t stepped on a scale since the last time I went to the doctor a few months ago.  At that time I was 160 so when I signed up for buddyslim that is the weight I entered.  So the gym where I work out is having a “maintain don’t gain” challenge that starts tomorrow and goes through January.  I wanted to sign up but the honest truth was I was too damn afraid to step on the scale and see if that 160 was still true.  So I did a “secret” weigh in on the scale in the locker room….to my dismay is said 165.  I was so disappointed and frustrated and also mad.  So I put my gym clothes on anyway.  I warmed up on the stationary bike for 15 minutes then hit the free weights and worked my arms.  When I didn’t want to do that last couple reps I reminded myself about those 5 extra pounds that I now have to lose because I didn’t realize they were there.  Damn it!

Ok, so I’ve been thinking about all the ‘little’ things that I’m looking forward to noticing as I start shedding off this weight.  I decided to write a list.  Maybe some of you can relate to some of them or maybe it will help you to stop and think about the little things that you are looking forward to in your own journey:

1) being able to wear my “cute” bras again…not the ginourmous over the shoulder boulder holders

2) looking in the mirror and not seeing a double chin

3)being able to see my private area when I look down and not this flabby belly

4) not having to pull my shirt down constantly after I walk because my hips make it ride up

5) being able to wear my old sports bras without half a boob popping out

6) being able to bend over and tie my shoes without feeling my belly jam into my legs

7) being able to cross my legs comfortably

Oh…and these are just a few that I am reminded of every single day.  There are a zillion other overall things I’m looking forward to but just wanted to jot these ‘little things’ down.  Hope everyone gets out there today and kicks butt in your workout even if you don’t feel like it!!!

So today as I was on the elliptical trainer and nearing that 10 minute mark with 20 minutes to go, sweat already dripping down my face, my feet already numb, I was thinking “what is going to help me push through the pain today?”  And suddenly a song by John Mellencamp came up on my ipod…can’t think of the name right off hand but he says “…you can bend me you can break me but you better stand clear…when the walls come tumblin’ down, when the walls come crumblin’ tumblin’…” and I thought to myself “YES!!  Life can bend me and break me but I’m breaking down the walls around me that has held me back from getting back on this wagon we call fitness!!  So look out!”  And those thoughts kept me going at full force through the rest of the 20 mintues.  It felt great.

So then I started wondering, what are some of the things that help you all push through the pain and kept  going to the end?  What thoughts do you replay in your head to get you through your workouts?  What songs inspire you to get through?

Every other Friday I’m off of work.  For the past (insert big number here) Fridays I have slept in late and once I did wake up I sat on the couch and watched TV for the rest of the day.  I would ‘think’ about working out….but…the longer I sat on the couch the less I felt motivated to do anything let alone exercise!  Today I got myself out of the house and went for a nice 1 1/2 mile walk around my neighborhood.  It felt great!  And the greatest part is this was the third day in a row I exercised!  It’s funny how as your walking and the blood starts pumping through your veins your mind gets a little clearer, goals seem achievable, and you get that little bit of excitement in the pit of your stomach. 

The singer Pink sings a song called “Don’t let me get me” that I was listening to today while I was on the treadmill.  Oh yeah, btw, I made it to the gym today - which makes two days in a row!!  Anyway, there are several lines in her song that rang true for me as well.  She says:

“Everyday I fight a war against the mirror
I can’t take the person starin’ back at me
I’m a hazard to myself”

and

“Don’t let me get me
I’m my own worst enemy
Its bad when you annoy yourself
So irritating
Don’t wanna be my friend no more
I wanna be somebody else”

Which in Pink’s case she didn’t like herself mentally which isn’t my case - well, at least not to the same extreme as her.  I’m sure she was making suicidal references which is not even close to my mindset.  However, I do annoy myself when I make bad food choices or choose to drink wine for dinner (and only wine). Or when I have every intention to workout when i get home but instead plop on the couch with a cold beer and get nothing done.  And then the next morning I look in the mirror and hate the image staring back at me and  say “today is the day.  I”m going to eat better today.  i”m going to make it to the gym today. ” and then….i don’t.

I know what to do to lose weight.  i”ve done it before after the birth of my first child.  I wasn’t on a ‘diet’ I just worked out - a lot.  I keep a food journal - religiously!  I had given up fast food 95%.  I was down to 16% body fat which for women is considered in the top athlete range.  However, over the past two years my life has changed a lot.  And while I consider myself a very positive, upbeat person, I somehow let go of that part of me and I can’t seem to find her.  I need motivation and encouragement from somewhere beyond myself like I used to have.  So I started searching for some sort of support group…and well…i landed here!

is not user friendly on this site.  I have used (and will continue to use) the one found on fitday.com.  It’s very intuitive and easy to use.